Eight Inappropriate Christmas Carols Parodies

It’s December again, and for those who want to liven up the holidays with some inappropriate Christmas carols, I have eight I have written starting from back in 2009.

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Favourite Songs I Heard for the First Time in 2009

What were your favourite pieces of music that you heard for the first time last year?

I don’t necessarily mean music that came out last year, just that you heard it for the first time last year because it was new to you. If you care to share, you can put it in the comments following the post. I’d love to know to expand my musical horizons.

Below are a list of favourite songs I heard for the first time in 2009, enough that would fit on CD were I to have made one. Most were from musicals as I really got into them in 2009 after my classic jazz year in 2008. A few were one-off takes on television events, though, so I’ll start with one that was both. It was available on YouTube like most of my selections so I have included the videos to have the music right here for you. I also linked the songs to blog posts I did inspired by them, where I did one.

Someone Like You

from Jekyll & Hyde
Linda Eder & Frank Wildhorn on 2000 PBS Special
Linda Eder delivers a loving performance of this gorgeous song with touching lyrics, accompanied by husband Frank Wildhorn, who had composed the song. (blog post)

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Upload of this video sometimes seems a bit slow so please be patient.

If You Were Gay

from Avenue Q
Rick Lyon and John Tartaglia

Love and humour, not just in song but also video spoof. (blog post)

The Internet is for Porn

from Avenue Q
Stephanie D’Abruzzo, Rick Lyon & the Guys
Possibly the funniest song I have ever heard! (blog post)

Mix Tape

from Avenue Q
Stephanie D’Abruzzo and John Tartaglia

A song that dragged my emotions up and down, enhanced by Stephanie’s nuances of acting while singing this song. (blog post)

As Long as You’re Mine

from Wicked
Idina Menzel and Norbert Leo Butz
An often overlooked song from Wicked that I only heard once I saw the musical, rather than hearing the more popular songs from it. However, I loved it immediately, especially the soft-spoken ending.

Academy Awards 2009 Introduction

Hugh Jackman and Anne Hathaway
This number was both brilliant and unexpected in being clever, funny and spectacularly performed. My intro to the full talents of Hugh Jackman. (blog post)

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Monologue Song

from Saturday Night Live November 7, 2009
Taylor Swift

How to trash everybody you want to with class and humour while being really cute about it. (blog post)

Vodpod videos no longer available.

Dark Eyes

by Bob Dylan
Judy Collins
Judy Collins gives this sad Dylan song a haunting rendition. (blog post)

Better Angels

Lesley Gore
The original It’s My Party girl seriously grows up with this beautiful tune I first heard on CSI Miami (compilation video of episode shown below).

I Got a Feeling

Black Eyed Peas
Just an awesome dance song, ’nuff said cause I’m getting dancing! Best 2009 song in my opinion. (I chose the flash mob version shown on Oprah for the video cause it’s also so awesome!)

Wake-up

The Arcade Fire
I heard this song via the trailer for Where the Wild Things Are and thought they had made a pretty good choice for a theme song.

The Closest Thing to Crazy

by Mike Batt
Katie Melua
Pretty much describes what feeling in love feels like to me. (blog post)

I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas

Gayla Peevey
I heard it on a Telus commercial and loved it immediately, a bit surprised I had never heard this 1950s seasonal classic until now. (blog post)

You’ve Gotta Have a Gimmick

from There’s No Business Like Show Business
Bernadette Peters, Julia McKenzie, Ruthie Henshall
This is probably the ultimate example of my claim that girls have all the fun songs in musicals, and the video only emphasizes the point.

Married

from Cabaret
Ron Rifkin, Michelle Pawk
A charming little song about marriage. A compact version is shown below.

Mystery

performed on the show Inside the Actor’s Studio
Hugh Laurie
A hilarious and charming example of how lyric writing sometimes feels like to me, trying to find desperate rhymes and more desperate words that conform with desperate rhymes. (blog post)

Love, Look in my Window

from Hello Dolly!
Ethel Merman

There isn’t a video for this one but the piece was written for Ethel Merman when she joined Hello Dolly! If you hear her perform it with the emotions she does, you’ll know why it was written for her. I can hardly keep from crying at points in it. Probably good I don’t have the music for that reason!

I Want A Hypothalamus For Christmas (parody lyrics for I Want a Hippopotamus for Christmas)

This could be a tricky carol to get a whole group to be able to sing. The video is below if you’ve never heard it or need a refresher to try singing the lyrics.

I got the idea for this song from the only thing I can think of to rhyme with hippopotamus, which was hypothalamus, a portion of the brain that contains a number of small nuclei with a variety of functions. Then I just had to make sure a few other things “made sense”, like how you don’t bring a hypothalamus through the door (last line, second verse or original lyrics), and I had my song.

The topic of this carol spoof is insensitive, I know, to those with hypothalamus disorders, but you can’t live life never insulting anybody. It’s not like I’m choosing to do this as part of a caroling set at a hospital or something, you know! So let’s go, queue the brass band needed and let’s sing!

My other Christmas carol parody lyrics:

I want a hypothalamus for Christmas

Only a hypothalamus will do

Don’t want no doll, nor Cranium nor toy

I want a hypothalamus that works well to enjoy

.

I want a hypothalamus for Christmas

I don’t think Santa Claus will mind, do you?

He won’t have to put it in with paper glue

Just ask a neurosurgeon, that’s the easy thing to do

.

I can see me now on Christmas morning, stomping down the stairs

Bitchy, grumpy but surprised when I open up my eyes

To see a hypo-thala-mus right there

.

I want a hypothalamus for Christmas

Only a hypothalamus will do

No frontal lobes, left/right thalamuses

I only like hypothalamuses

And hypothalamuses like me too!

.

Mom says the hypo, would mess me up but then

Teacher says a hypo controls my circadian

.

There’s lots of room for it in my half-empty brain

I’d house it there, protect it there, and be the same again

I can see me now on Christmas morning, stomping down the stairs

Bitchy, grumpy but surprised when I open up my eyes

To see a hypo-thala-mus right there

.

I want a hypothalamus for Christmas

Only a hypothalamus will do

No frontal lobes, left/right thalamuses

I only like hypothalamuses

And hypothalamuses like me too!


Dogs and Other Animals Facebook Picture Tagging Memes

I did not create these three Facebook picture tagging memes, but I adopted a picture of canine behaviour for Facebook tagging and I improved the quality of the animals tagging meme for Facebook picture tagging use. I also optimized both’s make-up for Facebook usage. I do not know from where the latter comes originally so there is no source link. As for the former, it’s for the dog lovers, not implying one’s friends are dogs. And, of course, you can also use this for other things as the original poster was created to do. I apologize I no longer have that link because I had found that original poster a long time ago, emailed it to someone and still had it in my Inbox.

To use any of these for your Facebook tagging fun:

  • Click on the picture to get it at full size.
  • Right click on that picture and save to your computer.
  • Upload it to your Facebook profile.
  • Tag your friends!

Please click here for a complete list of Facebook picture tagging memes on this site with which you can use for fun with your friends.

p.s. I did not correct spelling mistakes on the animals tagging meme because it was difficult to find the right font, size and all.