Remove PUBIC from Spellcheck to Avoid PUBIC Humiliation!

https://digitalcitizen.ca/tag/humour/WARNING:
Strong sexual terms are used in this post. Please don’t read if you don’t care for this type of language, but it is appropriate for the content, not used for the sake of using it. And this is NOT an April Fools Day joke, even if its content might seem to be one!

If you have to type the word public often, as I do working for government, also known as the public service or the public administration, may I recommend you remove pubic from your spell checker. If you don’t, your spell checker will never pick up on some potentially very embarrassing typos such as these words below in bold. For the fun of it, I made up definitions for them, in case you might actually find such terms to be useful in your vocabulary!


General pubic
A high ranking pervert in the military, which was funny a decade ago when I first wrote this but is a tragic epidemic now in the spotlight, happening years ago, it seems.

Go pubic
Not the business move the company was looking to make.

In pubic
Not where you were intending it to happen.

Pubic access
More access than you were probably intending to give.

Pubic act
I believe there are better terms for what this is than this term.

Pubic address system
Where you can hear broadcasts of the Vagina Monologues.

Pubic administration
Keeping your private business in order.

Pubic admonition
Warnings for when the genitalia misbehave.

Pubic affairs
Definitely not something you’d want to be disclosing!

Pubic announcement
For most people, talking out of one hole is plenty that we don’t need them to talk out of more! ~ groin ~

Pubic announcer
Cunts and dicks that talk.

Pubic archives
A massive porn collection.

Pubic bath
Cleaning of your genitalia.

Pubic beating
Getting badly hurt in the groin area in any number of ways.

Pubic body
What connects the genital head to the rest of your body.

Pubic Broadcasting Service (PBS)
The open source free amateur porn channel, supported by viewers like you.

Pubic company
What your genitalia calls a friend, or “non-sexual relations”, or a porn firm that trades on the stock markets.

Pubic consumption
Oral sex.

Pubic convenience
Anything that makes things easier on the pubic area, like Vaseline or lube.

Pubic debate
Also known as the Vagina Dialogues, or vaginal discourse.

Pubic declaration
When dicks and cunts make a statement to the world.

Pubic display
Exhibitionism or decorations down under.

Pubic documents
Magazines and other media of porn.

Pubic embarrassment
Small testicles like Donald Trump’s.

Pubic endowment
What those sexual spam emails are promising.

Pubic eye
A metaphor for the hole in the pubic area.

Pubic figure
Politically correct term for a persons referred to as cunts, dicks or politicians!

Pubic forum
Where many people are nude, whether spas, bath houses, showers in gyms and sport facilities, etc.

Pubic funds
What those sexual spam emails are seeking.

Pubic gardens
Things that grow, or are grown, in one’s pubic area, with those keeping the growth known as a whore-ticulturalists.

Pubic good
What LOTS of people would love to do!

Pubic group
A group only for dicks and cunts.

Pubic health
The state of things down under, and a real thing, just maybe not the thing you were intending to communicate.

Pubic holiday
Hey, now there’s a concept to solve the Western World’s declining birth rate problem!

Pubic housing
Underwear.

Pubic humiliation
Hard core BDSM of the worst kind!

Pubic institution
Places devoted to the pubic areas and/or porn.

Pubic knowledge
Sex education, especially that which should be known by most or all.

Pubic library
A porn collection smaller than the pubic archives.

Pubic misconception
When genitalia don’t look like what you thought they would.

Pubic offering
Thrusting the pelvis forward, especially without any garments covering them.

Pubic office
A bathroom or toilet.

Pubic official
A gynecologist or urologist?

Pubic opinion
You’d have to be stooping pretty low to be gathering this level of input.

Pubic park
That must be one major growth!

Pubic place
Where genitalia meet.

Pubic policy
Something government should definitely stay out of!

Pubic proclamation
A very formal pubic announcement.

Pubic relations
What Bill Clinton had with Monica Lewinsky given they did not have sexual relations.

Pubic scandal
The most shameful and damning kind of scandal.

Pubic safety
Barrier contraceptives, like condoms and garters, not the pill.

Pubic school
Where sex education should be taught.

Pubic sector
The porn sector.

Pubic servant
The ultimate submissive.

Pubic service
Can cover a wide range of activities so try to be more specific.

Pubic sex
Probably not the kind of sex you’re trying to convey.

Pubic space
The area covered by underwear.

Pubic speaking
The art of talking elegantly for dick heads and cunts.

Pubic spirit
Being horny in a socially acceptable way.

Pubic statement
An official comment about things down there.

Pubic stunt
Dangerous things intentionally done to the sensitive areas down there.

Pubic tragedy
Mishaps or tragedies to the genitalia, like accidents or mutilation.

Pubic transit
That would be air mail.

Pubic transportation
The best ride of your life!

Pubic utility
A sex toy.

Pubic venue
Build it and they will cum.

Pubic view
The view you get during oral sex.

Pubic wealth
Bling around your thing.

Reading pubic
The anti-sexual type.

Semi-pubic
Those lacking and without sufficient pubic funds.

.

Got any to add? Please leave a comment!

 

Seriously, I highly recommend you spellcheck any document you type for pubic if there’s even a chance the word public, appears in it, if you don’t remove it from your spellcheck dictionary. All the more so for documents that might be seen by others, i.e. pubic documents.
.

 

This was a post I first wrote over a decade ago, on a blog no longer searchable. I only recalled it today and thought it deserved to be online, with some edits, since it was my favourite post from that blog, for, both, insight, practicality, and humour.

 

 

850-ish words, pending what you count as part of the post and not disclaimers

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