Facebook’s Friendship Page Feature Gives Everyone New Spying Capabilities!

Facebook rolled out a creepy new feature called Friendship on Oct 29, 2010. Good intent, bad results. Lay another brick in the road to Hell that is paved with good intentions! Here is a review and some counter-measure suggestions. This feature is a stalker’s dream! But it’s the same for just the casual “troll” curious about creeping on people… like maybe jealous friends, ex’es, significant others, family, etc.

What is this Friendship Page feature?

This creates a page showing all the public wall posts, comments, photos (based on tags) and events that two friends have in common. This goes for any two profiles which have common things to share, not just friends you have in common. It’s all based on what people choose to share in their privacy settings, that they have in common.

In plain language, it’s like being able to ask Facebook to show me all the interactions between person X and Y which is not protected from me, with one click of a mouse, then getting the results in an organized online report, summarized where each result has a link to the full information instead of just thumbnail, first few sentences, etc.

Whoa!!! R U kidding me???

Remember the days when you had to work to be a creep? When you had to browse through all the wall posts, photos, events and such, filtering out all the stuff by people you’re not looking for, to find what you were looking for? That’s all said and gone now. You can just click on a link now and voilà! It’s all there for you, in more details than you could have ever hoped to find in the past, like events two friends RSVP’ed together! I bet the FBI, CIA, MI5, CSIS and other secret intelligence services could only wish they had such a convenient tool to track people! Well, take CSIS out of that list. I’m not sure they’re either secret or intelligent enough to qualify.

Can you imagine your significant other doing this to someone who interacted with you a bit “friendlier” than s/he would have liked? Can you imagine Parents doing this to their kids and one of their kids’ friends? Can you imagine that person you’re dating wanting to know more about another “friend”, or an “ex” via all your Facebook interactions with him/her since you could not tell all, even if you wanted to? You couldn’t hope to have a memory like these Friendship Pages!

Worse, the stalkers, Internet trolls or 5 types of Facebook trolls are just in heaven these days! That include those behind bars who have Internet access!

Even for normal people, this Facebook Friendship page can enhance the 10 Ways Facebook can ruin your relationship (Collegecrunch.org) by making the features that are the reasons all the more accessible and organized.

How do you access this Friendship Page feature?

The easiest way is to go to someone’s profile and look on their Wall for the See Friendship link next to the Comment and Like links on various Wall posts, and click on the link. I’m not sure why some Wall posts have the See Friendship link and some don’t, but it’s there for many posts. However, you can see Frienship Pages for people who are not your Facebook friend, which is the creepiest part of this feature to allow spying beyond just your friends, and vice-versa on you by people who are not your Facebook friend.

After you get to the Friendship Page, to the top right is a more convenient feature where you can type in two friends’ names, aided by Facebook’s drop down menu to guess which friend you’re talking about as you give it more letters in typing out the names. Facebook guesses with people you know, people you have common friends, who live in the area, etc. While this feature limits the people you can input to be just of your Facebook friends, finding the See Friendship link on people’s wall does not!

What can you see on these Friendship Pages?

More than what Facebook says you can! One feature more is the common friends those two friends have in common. Of course, everything that shows up, whether a wall post, comment, photo, event RSVP’ed together, etc. there is a link you can click on for more. The page you initially get is an Overview of what the page fully contains. You can then click on links to the upper left, below a photo (if the two have a photo together) or an icon of two heads, to filter out features like Wall posts, photos, comments, etc. Talk about helping creeps to be organized!!

What can you do to prevent being super-spied on with this Friendship Page feature?

Nothing that would prevent this feature from being enabled. All you can do is minimize its impact on you with these solutions.

  1. Adjust all Facebook Privacy settings to “Only Friends”. If you do this, at least only your Facebook friends will be able to creep on you.
  2. Purge your Facebook friends list. Ask yourself this… who would I want to be able to creep on me with the Friendship Page feature? Anyone you have a strong reaction against, throw them out or take Step 3. Purging your Facebook Friends list is good to do on a regular basis, anyway, to keep people who can view your profile in full to those who know and trust to some extent. The link I provided at the start of this bullet offers some assistance with questions you can ask yourself to determine who you might want to remove, and why it’s no big deal if you’re wrong to get them back. This was before this Friendship Page feature came out.
  3. Customize Facebook Privacy settings to “Only Friends” and Block certain people. If you’re not cool with removing certain people from your Facebook friends list, even though you’re not comfortable with them creeping on you with the Friendship Page, block them in your Privacy setting for whatever you don’t want them to see. That could be pictures, Wall posts or comments. I don’t believe the RSVP feature works, though. It’s hard to check, but that would be the one I would be concerned the most because that person could see future events you RSVP to in common with another friend, and not just past ones. Can you say stalking assistance? I would recommend you make a list of people you keep as Facebook friends who you would not be comfortable with creeping on you, and just add them to your “block” list for each Facebook feature like photos, Wall posts, etc. I’d just sooner take them off my Facebook friends list if I were you, if I’m going through that much trouble.

If this Facebook feature changes to limit access, or you know other ways to counter it, please let me and others know by leaving a comment.

In the mean time, Facebook safely and try not to creep, even if it may be very intriguing. If you don’t like people doing it to you, don’t do it to others.

p.s. I find it interesting Facebook rolled out this creepy feature just before Hallowe’en. Unfortunately, it won’t go away just because Hallowe’en has gone away. Who the hell at Facebook let their engineer Wayne Kao add this to the site anyway???

Other Facebook issue posts on my site:

The Prejudices and Privacy Perils of Facebook Quizzes

How to Get Rid of Your Facebook Past

25 Things For Facebook You Can’t Steal My ID With

25 Things You Gave on Facebook to Help Get Your ID Stolen

Una Guía de Netiqueta Práctica para Facebook

The Theory of Creationism

Larry King challenged Michael Moore on Larry’s show on Oct 13 while discussing whether or not evolution should be allowed to be taught in school, as opposed to creationism. Larry “corrected” Michael to remind Michael that it was the theory of evolution, not evolution.

Wait a minute here. If evolution is still a theory, shouldn’t creationism also be a theory?

Since when did the Bible become “proof” for anything? They call religion faith because you have to believe in it, not know it for certain, you know. And I do mean you know.

Seriously, considering the evidence, creationism is far closer to a theory than evolution. But in the spirit of mutual respect, let me then propose a suggestion.

Why don’t we refer to evolution and creationism both as theories?

I’ve long heard about the theory of evolution, but the theory of creationism… hmmm.

Besides being scientifically correct, I LIKE IT! 🙂

Don’t You Love a Good World Drama like with the Chilean Miners?

Like a tens of millions of people around the world, I am watching the final phases leading to the rescue capsule attempt to extract the first of 33 Chilean miners trapped for 68 days now. I really am, blogging during commercials.

There always seems to be “big” breaking news these days, especially on all news network like CNN or CBC Newsworld in Canada. However, every once in a while, something really big comes along, and it is really something to see and feel the world focused on an event like this. I know people watching. I see updates on my Facebook page. I can see people watching walking around in public areas with television screens. Even some sports bars have this drama instead of sports because, in all honesty, it’s far more drama than any sport can provide.

Speaking of television, I wonder what the event will do to the television ratings of shows tonight? And who’s going to be saying I was watching (fill in a Tuesday night show) instead of this at the water cooler at work on Wednesday? What are people going to think of them?

I’m not one to be glued to the television, and definitely not a news junkie, but I can’t remember being this captivated by news since 9/11, and then the start of the Iraq War before that in the 1990s. Very fortunately, this has a much more hopeful and inspirational tone.

But let’s not forget, things could still go wrong. They talk about the potential technical problems. They talk about the potential problems with the physical and mental health of the men as they will take this journey up the shaft back into the world, and the journey back into the social world as everything would have changed in their lives. Not just by the event but family dynamics that made due without them. Roles will have been changed and may forever be changed. Some will use the mine ordeal as excuses to warrant deserving any number of things in their relationships, which will only be tolerated for some time. Certainly, potential career changes will have to be contemplated as going back down into a mine for the next shift won’t be so easy. There will be the media and social circus that some won’t handle well, whether from stress or new opportunities for which they will abandon their old families and/or livelihood given the temptations of fame, and maybe money that comes with it as far as interviews, book and/or movie deals, etc. So much to adapt to and handle that I wonder if 5 or 10 years from now, some of the miners might say the time after the ordeal was more difficult for them to handle than the ordeal itself of being trapped for all that time. Most people can’t handle fame, you know… even the ones who have been living in it for a long time.

Despite all the things anticipated, I can’t help wonder if there might be any potential drama back in the mine when the time comes to get the men out one by one. There’s been a list drawn up, but what if someone decides to buck that at the last moment? It might be out of panic not to have to wait so long, or maybe for some other reasons. There will be rescuers sent down who could be taken hostage, and so on. Humans are a little unpredictable in that sense.

And they will have to repeat this journey 33 miners times so there are plenty of opportunities for things to go wrong.

And what then when something goes wrong? Will they cut off the coverage?

Well, I’ll try not to think about it. Let’s not anyone think about it.

Positive thinking from here on in for everyone’s safety. It might take 2-3 days in total for everyone to get out so after the euphoria of the first rescue, there will still be lots of anticipation and one more spike when the last person comes up.

In the meanwhile, I’ll go and pray. I’m not religious, but I’m not against praying to all the deities out there, either. Let’s just say I believe in praying.

Best wishes to the Chilean miners for a safe return to the surface and to a more regular life. The world is with you.

Flesch-Kincaid Grade Reading Level: 7.7

Would You Commit Vigilante Justice to Stop Severe Bullying on Your Kids if the System Couldn’t?

Parents generally say they’d die to save their kids if ever in such a situation. Would they really? Bullying in America might just put that to the test soon. See why and take the survey at the end.

There is a bullying epidemic going on in America. For all the awareness being done about it, there doesn’t seem to be anything more concrete that is producing actions and results. Ellen Degeneres puts out a message that goes viral. People around the country wear pink for a day. However, while people are listening, they all seem just to shake their heads at the problem and get on with their lives afterward.

We just hear more stories about kids and young adults committing suicide over bullying, often with a history in each case where the signs were all there, but that the system just ignored them and failed the people involved. It was bad enough in Mentor, Ohio, a very prevalent CNN Top 100 Places to Live neighbourhood, that 4 bullied teens has committed suicide, one after another, and all the school could say was that complaints lodged were deleted during a computer transfer (Yahoo Oct 8 2010). The family even had to watch the bullies come past the open casket at the wake and laugh at their daughter lying there dead!

I don’t know what the answer is to stop the rash of bullying going on in America, but I’m pretty sure it’s going to take a concerted effort from the top to the bottom. There needs to be some visible leadership to get some laws in to make it a heavily punishable crime. The people in the system, especially the school system, needs to buy in to watch for signs and take complaints more seriously. However, I think the most crucial element will be the “organic” one from everyday people because you can put in all the laws you want, if you can’t enforce them, they’re no good. It takes a presence to see or notice things going on in order to prove, if not stop in the moment, the bullying going on. If the cops could do that to the level needed to stop bullying, there’d be no epidemic like there currently is. Local grass roots movements are going to have to be set up and mobilized to reduce the bullying, whether by preventing it in the first place or providing enough evidence to convict those guilty. If not, I am afraid that sooner or later, there will follow a rash of stories about Parents taking justice into their own hands to commit violence against the bullying kids and young adults, to try and stop the bullying, because they just feel nothing else can be done.

Am I crazy to think this? Try this train of thought, then answer the poll at the end.

As a Parent, would you be willing to die to save your kid’s life if a situation let you make this decision?

Whether you are a Parent or not, I think you know the perception in society is that a lot of good Parents would say “yes”.

Well, committing assault or murder against some kids to stop severe bullying on your kids is just a situation. In some cases, there are plenty of signs, and complaints lodged just go unanswered for years, like that in Mentor, Ohio. That’s plenty of time to think about “stepping in” with some vigilante justice. It’s not even a sudden situation like a car underwater and you have to make a decision to get your kids out before you to save them while dying in the process. This can be thought about, or come to a boiling point for rash action one day. Furthermore, you probably don’t even have to die for it. Just plea bargain for life in prison, if it’s murder, or plea guilty for less penalty if it’s not murder as the death penalty might not apply. What jury wouldn’t “understand” your choice? The jury might still give you a lighter sentence or acquit you even if you don’t plea guilty. There have been far more ridiculous acquittals than a crime for your “cause”. And because it’s usually more than one person doing the bullying, you could save the world a bunch of bullies for one “life”. Isn’t “fair trade” in these days?

Is that what it’s going to take before anybody does anything about this bullying?

I would certainly hope not! But how much patience does America have? Wait. America and patience?

Also, let’s hope the Parents of kids who committed suicide over bullying don’t take any drastic actions after their kids’ death, either, when they may perceive there isn’t anything else to live for. Hey, lots of people do revenge killings for things far less than their children. Killing out of revenge for your kid’s death is pretty real, in my mind.

I hope America will stop its soul searching soon and get doing something about this bullying epidemic. There’s no need for soul searching here. It’s just wrong! So get going to do something about it.

What can be done you might ask?

Well, how’s about forming something like a voluntary citizen neighbourhood patrol? Or have a group of people willing to accompany the bully victims where they aren’t under supervision, like the walks to and from school, or even in school over lunch and such? Just one person with a victim would do. It doesn’t have to even be someone big and strong, either. Just having another person there to be a credible witness would deter a lot of bullies. One bullied student’s story versus a group that lie together to defend themselves may be hard to win a case on, but one adult who can confirm the bullied student’s story turns the tables completely. Get a group together where individuals could be called upon as cases arise. It’s voluntary, but I hear there are a lot of unemployed Americans these days. Surely there must be some among them who would be willing to step up, if not some retired people and just other good citizens able to find the time.

Schools could also have more supervision around, and rules about what students could be kicked out for, whether kicked out of school or just the lunch cafeteria. Give the bullied students some places of solace. Take their complaints more seriously.

While none of this would likely ever stop the bullying, it probably could relieve it enough that far fewer students might get to the point of suicide. It might not be cool for the bullied student to be viewed as needing an adult to protect them, but I don’t think being cool is their first priority in life under the circumstances.

Meanwhile, get some laws in to make punishments for bullying real to those who do it. They’re mostly not yet adults. They’ll not likely be charged with a lot of jail time anyway. So just put in a bill for some jail time for starters.

And continue the awareness efforts. Just make sure there’s more to go with it.

It’ll be interesting to see where this goes in the next couple of years. Let’s hope it’ll never get to Parents committing violence on the kids. But in the meanwhile, the question lingers in my mind.

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Notes:

I am not a Parent so I am not writing this with emotional blindness a Parent might. I can only imagine the situation. Yet, I feel it is realistic enough a situation that I think if I were a Parent, I might just answer “yes” to my own poll.

As for the bullies, ironically, they’re the ones with the least self-esteem. Not able to succeed in life by the measures the rest of society uses to determine success, they have to gang up on individuals just to feel good about themselves… and they can’t even do it alone. Unfortunately for them, life doesn’t afford them this opportunity for ever. It’ll only be a matter of time before their loser status catches up to them, and it’ll be a lot harder to dig out later in life than earlier. Too bad they’re too stupid to realize this.

Flesch-Kincaid Grade Reading Level: 8.0

As of Oct 8 2010, Try Harder NOT to Get Arrested in Canada

A Canadian Supreme Court ruling came down today that limits access to lawyers for people being questioned by police regarding a criminal case.

The Supreme Court of Canada ruled that a person questioned by police in connection with a criminal case does not have the right to have a lawyer present during the interview. The Supreme Court also said a suspect doesn’t have the right to re-consult with a lawyer midway through an interview, unless the situation in the interview has changed significantly. Finally, the court said a suspect does not have the absolute right to consult with a specific lawyer if that attorney can’t be reached within a reasonable time.
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– Canadian Broadcasting Corporation (CBC, Oct 8 2010)

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I’m no lawyer, but in the spirit of free speech, I’ll throw in an opinion.

I’m siding with the decision here. I do think suspects have too much access and counsel to “prepare” themselves for questioning by police. Really, if you’re innocent, a little preparation to make sure you say what you need to properly, which isn’t necessarily the “right” thing to say, is all you need. Extensive counseling from lawyers so you don’t incriminate yourself basically alludes just that, even if you’re presumed innocent till proven guilty. That’s an ideal, and we all know humans aren’t ideal people, as much as we strive for it.

But I write this post because I have a practical piece of advice to those worried about this split 5-4 ruling.

Try harder NOT to get arrested.

This ruling will then have no direct significance to them. If they worry about it affecting them indirectly through those they know and/or love, advise them of the same thing. More common sense in the world means less legal system.

I’m not encouraging people to be better criminal while in Canada so as not to get caught. I’m encouraging people to stay within the law in Canada.

Save the tax system some money. Save the yourself some hassle. Save the lawyers some income.

Flesch-Kincaid Grade Reading Level: 7.5